*Ahem* So today was a rather shitty day. I have depression and I'm not saying that I have any right to be more pissed off or upset than any one else but things do get to me rather easily. So, as I said, I had a rather craptacular day. Fine, whatever, it happens. I was dealing with it.. until my mam told me I was banned from going to see my friends until I went back to school.
Now normally I wouldn't have a problem with this but A: My friends are the only things keeping me sane (other than music) and B: It wasn't my fault I wasn't in school. I was supposed to have this meeting today but my dad couldn't take me.. anyway I'm getting slightly off point.
I took this kinda hard and went to my room, music full blast, wouldn't talk to even my best friend. I sat on my bedroom floor looking at a blade, debating whether I should cut or not. I've recently stopped self harming and this was the first time I'd really thought about going back there.
I put down the blade.
I put down the blade.
Instead, I did my hair and my make up.. and I put on a ballerina outfit and danced my little heart out. I danced until all 5ft 4 of me ached. When my sister walked in giggling at me, I looked her straight in the eyes and said "I bet you're jealous!" and I kept dancing.
Everyone has the power turn their own mood around, and it doesn't have to be in a destructive way. Draw a picture, listen to some music or just be down right childish and silly. Have a laugh with yourself! Be happy! Smile till your jaws feel like their going to fall off! Be yourself :)
And most of all.. be the change you want to see in the world. Today I'm going to be... A Ballerina :)
Peace out,
Er-Bear-Rawrr x
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